Happiest moment of my life

Have you ever sat back and think about when was the last time you were so happy that nothing in the whole world could ruin that precious moment?? I mean...not even a single thing could ruin it...not even failing your exams....not even getting fired....not even breaking up with your partner.....not even getting robbed....not even losing every single penny in the casino, and not even getting accused of something that you were not guilty of. I actually thought about this for a long long time...and I found out that the last time I actually felt like I was on top of the world was when I got my Taylor 714ce guitar about two years ago. OMG...can't believe my little Taylor is 2 years old already. Sigh....they grow up so fast.

Anyway, when was the happiest moment of my life, you might ask?

It was on October 17th 2008 at about 4.13pm that defined the happiest moment of my entire life. This was the moment when my guitar teacher, Harry Gusman, said to me in the following words:

"Veron, I wanna propose a challenge to you. I have a gig in March, and maybe I want you to play guitar in my band....only if you want to and only if I think you are ready. I'm going to choose between you and another student of mine through an audition. What do you think?"

These were the exact (not really) words that came out of his mouth. And the only words that came out of mine were "......."! None...nada...zilch. I had trouble processing the words...I mean I understood what he was saying the entire time, but I just had trouble believing and actually making sense out of it. After an awkwardly long pause, I finally muttered, "Cool!" COOL????? Was that all I could think of to say? What the hell is wrong with me???!!! Couldn't I be more excited and go, "OMG...really? You really want me to play your gig? U really think I'm good enough? I'm so happy that you believe in me, Harry! Thanks for the opportunity" But hell no....all I could say was a very cool "Cool!"

Nevertheless, I was soooooo damn happy that he gave me this opportunity. You have no idea how much I've wanted this....you have no damn idea!! All my life, I've only been hoping to perform on stage one more time...just like Talentime in high school. I want that rush back....I need it to gain back my confidence. This is not just some high school garage band gig....this is a professional gig...where I actually jam with professional musicians who can play songs like "Sweet child of mine" by Guns & Roses and "Cocaine" by Eric Clapton without making mistakes. OMG...did I go way over my head?! Can I actually handle this?? But then again, my guitar teacher wouldn't ask me if he didn't think I can handle it. I mean...why the hell did he pick me out of his dozens and dozens of students if he didn't think I was good, right? Right!

Well, truth to be told, I'm actually a favorite student of his. LOLZ!! NO NO...I don't gosok his kasut...or kiss his ass...He just thinks I'm very talented and he wants to teach me the best he could, so that he can get the satisfaction, and so that I will improve on my guitar skills...so it's worth the money I pay every month. It's a lot of money ya know...it's about 40% of my month's pay. Aha...no wonder I don't have much savings....DUH!!!

Anyways, I can truly say from the bottom of my heart that this is the moment I've been waiting all along. You see, my life has been very miserable ever since I've come to Sydney. I've felt lonely, left out, caught in between cultures, stressed out, challenged, and been thru lots of changes. I understand that all of these are part of growing up to be an adult...but I guess there are some parts of my life as a child that I wanna keep in my life, even if it's too childish for an adult. For example, I still love looking and shopping for stationery even if I don't need it, especially colored pencils....I still love looking at kid's toys such as board games, legos, puzzles, etc...I still love reading children's story books such as fairy tales like Cinderella, Hansel & Gretel....I still love eating candy that I've eaten as a child....and nevertheless, I still love to play guitar just like I did back in high school.

It would be such a major turning point of my life if I get to play the gig. OH PLEASE LORD....LET ME BE THE ONE!! I WANT THIS SO BAD!! SOOOOO BADDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!! I WOULD TOTALLY GIVE UP EVERYTHING FOR THIS GIG!! EVERYTHING!!! ALL MY MONEY...MY PRIDE...MY TIME...MY JOB...EVEN COOKING!!

Oh my God...HAVE I MADE THE WRONG DECISION TO MAKE COOKING AS MY CAREER???? OMG OMG OMG!!! Fuck no....VERON, GET THIS THOUGHT OUTTA YOUR HEAD RIGHT NOW!!!! Remember!! You love your hobby more than your career, okay???!!! Which means that you love to play guitar more than cooking...which is why playing guitar should always be your hobby!! Never your career. You can hate your job, but never your hobby! Shove this thought into your brain right now, Veron!

I'm sorry...sometimes I like to monologue! Anyway...to sum up...my guitar teacher offered me to play guitar at his gig. I'm truly honored..and very excited! I really wish I would get this, instead of the other person. I am very motivated to practise three times as hard as I would normally do. Usually I would practise about an hour in two days. So starting today, I'm gonna start practising at least 2 hours everyday...NO EXCUSES!! Doesn't matter if I'm too tired....doesn't matter if I'm gonna miss out on my sleep (I'm insomniac anyway). Bottom line is, I am gonna work very hard to top this audition! Wish me luck, guys....and definitely pray for me! Thanks for sharing my joy...have a good one! See ya next time!